Lies parents tell themselves

What are some of the things as a parent you told yourself and learned later, that was a lie?

1. Me: I’ll never lie to my child…Also me: “Yes, that’s how the cookie came out of the package, yes it looks like someone took a bite, so weird”
2. “The great lies parents tell themselves is that a kid will sleep in after a night of disruptive sleep”
3. Which is the bigger lie parents tell themselves?
   1. “Only one big gift for Christmas this year”
   2. “End of summer I’m gonna make them go to bed earlier to prepare for school”
4. “I will never make different meals for my kids or pander them and their whimsical ways”
5. “I thought bedtime was supposed to get easier not worse as your kids get older”
6. “Once the kids are out of diapers I will have time and money”
7. “Family putt-putt will be a fun, bonding experience”
8. “Kids don’t need a lot of stuff, you’ll still be able to pack lightly”
9. “We’ll get two so that they won’t fight”
10. Making plans with friends “When things slow down” and knowing you both mean in 3-5 years, not tomorrow